chickwhorides

Monday, September 17, 2012

A letter from my dog!

I found this on my computer when I got back from a weekend away- Martie had a friend coming by to see her, but I guess she missed me anyway. When I left, I had been itchy, thanks to multiple spider bites...My dog is awesome. Her spelling skills, not so much...

April 12, 2011

Dear Mom,

This is Martie speaking, and I just wanted to formalize that fact that I missed you, Mom. You left and I thought about hiring a taxi to come pick me up to find you, but then I thought better of it because I cannot pay him in slober. I thought about hi-jacking an airplane, but they do not understand the nuance of a bark so my threatening tone would be lost on them. I have now rethought my idea of inserting a tracking device into your skin so that I may know your every move, all those spider bites are my test spots.

I have a friend outside, it is a new grey cat, did you get this toy for me? If so it is very realistic and I find the meow’s even to be in authentic cat dialect. I am now deconstructing “Meows”….now you know how sad I’ve been.

I tried drawing you a picture but my lack of opposable thumbs makes it hard, it ended up turning out to be a mutant green been, so I decided on this love note.

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU! I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE BACK!

-Martie!